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A question probably posed by tens of thousands of people these days. With so many singles and dating sites available this question will be pondered by someone somewhere every second of the day.
First of all we need to look at the question; “Do only desperate people use the Internet for dating”. This question often arises from people who done dating the ‘old’ way, and don’t see why you would want to go online and meet some stranger you know nothing about, but this is generally what happens in the real world anyway, unless you are courting your own cousin!!! Most of the teenager’s idea of dating in the real world these days consists of getting drunk, and waking up with someone you don’t even know the name of! Or your sister’s best friend (Hope my lad isn’t reading this ... oh hang on... I’ve done the same thing myself...!!!!)
This day and age with everyone working every hour they can, and the fast pace of life, it is quite normal to date on internet, and you’ll find those people that are shy, single parents who seldom get out are finding love online.
Moving onto the love question, this is actually very complex. First of all woman tend to have a different deeper meaning of the word love than guys. Women seldom use it when they don’t mean it, whereas guys will use it to just shut the woman up, make her feel precious even though he doesn’t love her, or “I love you” straight after sex can just mean “thanks for the shag”!! We also have reciprocal love, were the girl tells the guys she loves him, so the guy says it back, which is a bit like giving a dog a cookie to do tricks!! If the guy tells you out of the blue with no prompting, he means it
Now after saying that some guys are thinking either “no way is that me”, while other guys are thinking, “bugger, hope my other half doesn’t read this”, the majority will be in the former group. One problem with most women is that as soon as they here the guy say the L.O.V.E. word they instantly think it’s the same love they feel, not always the case, but can be.
Another problem with love is it also means different things in different cultures. Take a British-Filipina relationship. The Philippines tends to have different levels of love which they inherited from the Americans, whereas in Britain it is rarely used in that way. In the Philippines you can love your other half, parents, siblings, cousin, aunties, even that little cockroach that lives in your cheese in the fridge! Whereas most guy in Britain tend to reserve the ‘love’ word for the one they share their life with.
This all tends to cloud what is a simple question, but if either party says it without prompting online, in all probability they mean it as people are more forward than in real life. If the guy is the first one to say it between the couple then 99.9% of the time he means it. Why would he put himself in a position to look a complete idiot and an embarrassment? Most will wait for the woman to say it first to make sure they will not be making themselves look stupid.
I would like to add that my own opinion would be that online love would be truer and deeper than that if it was a date in real life, as long as both parties are truthful. This is because in the real world with relationship love can get confused with sexual lust, something that doesn’t happen on the internet.
So if you are internet dating and start to have feelings for someone, just go with the flow. You only live once.
So how do you figure out what type of love each person has for each other? Talk about it, especially if you are form different cultures as the meaning and depth of love will mean different things, and if you don’t explain all this you could hurt the very person you are informing that you love them.
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